Blind faith

 

A man wakes up one morning with the filthiest hangover and no recollection of the night before. Slowly opening his eyes, he sees a bottle of aspirin and a glass of water on the bedside table. He looks around the room to find his clothes are on the dresser, neatly folded, with a clean shirt on top. The bedroom is immaculate. On the bedside table is a note, which says, ‘Darling, your breakfast is in the kitchen. I love you.’ Downstairs, he finds his favourite cereal, croissants, fresh OJ and freshly brewed coffee laid out waiting for him, along with the morning paper – and his 15-year-old son, who is finishing his own breakfast. ‘Tell me, son,’ he asks, ‘what happened last night?’ ‘Well, says the boy, ‘you came home so blind drunk you didn’t even know your own name. You nearly broke the door down, then you were sick in the hallway, then you knocked the furniture over and when Mum tried to calm you down, you thought she was the police, so you gave her a black eye.’ ‘Christ!’ says the man. ‘Then how come my clothes are all folded, the house is tidy and my breakfast is ready?’ ‘When Mum dragged you into the bedroom and tried to get your trousers off to put you into bed, you shouted at her, ‘Get your filthy hands off me, you whore, I’m married!”

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9 Comments

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9 responses to “Blind faith

  1. andrew

    hmm me i would be in the gar age…….

  2. Curiosity

    Hmm! He is lucky he did not get the rolling pin treatment at the giving her a black eye stage.

  3. ravingpoet

    ….hmm, what price fidelity, eh? J x

  4. Pat

    Initially I thought it was funny but it made me uncomfortable. Then I realized that it reinforces some very harmful sexual stereotypes. Fine to come home drunk, verbally and physically abuse your wife, so long as you are faithful.Okay, I know it is just meant to be a joke, but…

  5. Deb's

    lmao.. I love it Pen… it made me giggle.but would add after reading Pats comment … it got me thinking about humour in general; and I thought that was part of the role of humour, we laugh at things we are not comfortable with, not just the things that amuse us, the parts of the pscyhe we are yet to face and understand, it helps to bring attention to the negativity of stereotyping, and what we perceive as acceptable behaviour even raising our social consciousness by testing our own understanding of social norms and mores as well as our personal boundaries and levels of comprehension… as well as finding amusement in ourselves in our own shortcomings, failings and so on, finding the irony in the day to day… humour is as good a teacher as any other.glad you got the comp probs sorted, love n hugsdebsxXx

  6. penny

    @ Debs….. I agree, we laugh at things we are not comfortable with as well as things that amuse us. I trust anyone who read this joke did not imagine I was condoning domestic violence. Downloading a new driver solved the computer problem Cheers Debs.

  7. Curiosity

    So I shouldn’t clobber him with a rolling pin then?!…..not that I do!

  8. Jennifer

    Hey Pen, great to read this funny story. Must return and catch up with your other interesting posts. May everything go on well with you. :D

  9. Happy

    Would never think you condone domestic assault. Often joke elements raise really uncomfortable issues that make me do a double-take. There are so many layers in this jab of anecdotal humour. Would be a great discussion starter about multiple topics. Hope all is well in your stretch of the Universe. Am glad computer issues managed. At least you know what to do…I just sit and wring my hands.

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